If you get married it is exciting and busy and wonderful, if you get a separation it is busy and emotional.
While being married is meant to be wonderful – it can come with anxiety which will affect sleep – considering you are meant to be sleeping with a person now. Some need time to adjust to this – others will tell them this means something is wrong – all it means is the situation is new and as humans we all take time to adjust.
I think it doesn’t matter if you are the divorcer or divorcee – the effects on life’s fundamentals will still be similar. People may tell you they are fine and they might honestly look and appear fine, however, deep down they know something isn’t right. And realistically why would it be – they need time to adjust.
In regards to sleep mainly – because this is a sleeping blog I can suggest some similar things to do – for both marriage and divorce participants!
* A nice start might be a new bed together and new sheets and accessories
* Set up the room together (or not if you are divorcing!)
* Make it different and new – now that it is a new beginning.
When I separated and I knew I was divorcing (you have to be separated for one year and one day) it was important to me to have a new bed. I had a friend and it was important to her to have a new bed and sheets and doona etc. I didn’t really care about the sheets so I just bought new ones over time. I gave my old bed to my ex-husband and he is still using it – so for some people it is not high on their priority list!
If you are having trouble accepting the new arrangements (divorce) try and keep yourself busy and do things of a night time a little different to the way you used to. Set up coffee nights with friends, catch up on jobs, organise yourself, have night-time beauty sessions!
If you have kids and you are separating – while they don’t need a new bed – they will need support like a new bed! They might need special photos for memories, to plan new things to look forward to, more ‘Mum’ and ‘Dad’ time etc. Kids will also need you to make sure you keep up the house and their needs so School and other things in their life are not affected. Keeping busy in this way will also help you get through the hardest times.