When people immerse themselves in a bunch of negative thoughts, the triggers can sometimes lead to actions that they might regret later.
The scenario goes something like this:
It is night and it is quiet and your brain starts going over things about your current love interest and you want to hear from them so you text. There is no reply and you think that is weird so you text again. You can see they are on Facebook so you text again. Your texts go from super sweet to a begging form and you need to stop, but you can’t and you think another text won’t hurt. You are not in control at the moment so you need to gather your thoughts. Notice your breathing and your body and how tense you feel.
I think refraining is hard, but you will feel grateful that you did. Too many texts makes you look desperate and I don’t think they will encourage a reply, but just make you feel more uneasy. If sending many texts made you feel better, then it would at least be partly positive, but how do you feel after you have sent 5 or 6 ‘needy’ texts? Do you feel more anxious than when the texting started? If the answer is yes and it is okay if it is: STOP TEXTING.
Put your phone in a drawer and close the door to the room and go somewhere else in the house and get busy. If it helps talk to someone else, leave the house, have a shower, go for a drive, go outside and breathe deeply and this change of scenery will re-direct your thoughts and if you still feel like texting, after you have left it for 30 minutes, then do this, but chances are you won’t be interested in texting this same person anymore tonight. How do you feel now? Is your breathing calm? Praise yourself for taking yourself out of a stressful situation. Next time, this process will be easier and after a few times, you will notice your triggers and be able to catch yourself before you involve anyone else in one of your stressful moments.