Invaluable advice from friends
Friends. Friends are so invaluable. Good friends are hard to find, but once you do, you are set for life. We have different friends which meet different needs. Just life others befriend us because we fulfil a certain need for them.
The value true friends give can be so helpful. A listening ear on absolutely anything, from making the best pumpkin soup, to finding the perfect gift for a mother-in-law, to stopping the husband from snoring! I am female so I understand the female to female friendships more than the male to male friendships. I think sometimes women have more opportunities to make friends at school and after school activities etc.
I often think of the school drop-off and pick-up ritual as a research point. I often say to people I have been at the school doing research. It may look like general chit chat but never think that! I may need to bounce something of someone. A lot of people have wonderful husbands and wives, but friends can offer support that sometimes the spouse can’t…could be just a day of shopping support!
So think about your friends and make sure they know you appreciate them.
Doc says
Another very good point indeed Shaz. Methinks I would like to be the proverbial fly on the wall during one of your tete-a-tetes with your lady affiliates. Tis a very interesting point you make re different friends for different needs. I am definitely one to espouse the principle of gathering as many friends into my compicated network as possible as each friend represents a different world within us, a world we were possibly not aware of until the new friend arrived, and it is only by this meeting that the new world is born. It is one of the wonders of human relationships that sometimes we attract into our lives a friend who hitherto we perhaps would not haved considered a potential friend but then one moment our planets align and we find that we have something in common and friendship becomes mutually beneficial. Whilst this is quite hard for me to say given my most recent stand, a hug may very well be worth a thousand words but a good friend is worth much more because they tend to know all about you and yet still choose to love you 🙂
You are correct about the social interaction opportunites available to each sex for the making of friends, and the various scenarios under which we meet has a huge impact on the type of friend we thus make. However, my experience is definitely that the female-female friendship is a very different accord to the male version. I think that the male friendship may better withstand the various tests of its strengths including that of time. Conversely, female friendship may be a little tenuous at times and need a constant nurturing. Of course I am happy to debate that and be proven wrong.
Therefore do not discount the notion of male-female friendship. While it is said by many that this is not possible and I would postulate that this it is harder for the male to maintain at a platonic level, there may be an opportunity for a perspective that your same sex friends simply cannot provide. Whilst I would agree that it may be difficult for the average bloke to empathise with female issues, at times a little naivety can breed some serious creativity. I have a good friend, I shall call him Roger to protect his innocence, who really enjoys being called upon, in times of need, to provide male input and perspective and he tells me that he would much rather be involved in social discourse with females than with his brothers!!!